Alternative/Indie - Touring Part 2

After checking out the various trips they endure, I wanted to unscrew my throbbing head, wrap it in Sensus memory foam and lock it in a dark closet with a couple of Heinekens.

Paying their dues this way and if lucky enough to eventually earn “high-life” money, well, I say they bloody deserve it. For the big bucks, it still wouldn't suit me in any way, shape or form. I marvel at their intestinal fortitude. It's one of the more impressive take-aways from this continuing education.

I don't think the general public fathoms the true nature of this daily grind. An important music showcase called SxSw is a yearly affair in Austin, Tx. In the past, band members have been seen running from venue to venue (they can play many in a day), hands full of instruments, equipment etc, hoping to arrive on time. Fingers are crossed that they are left with a few minutes to set up properly. Nobody wants to sound crappy right? A pinch of chaos. Grind!

Next time the urge rushes over you to rag on a band, please hold a sec and just know that there are hard-ships day to day and it ain't no picnic! Perhaps you might consider communicating your words more diplomatically.

Alternative/Indie – Touring

What the f**k is that smell?

Touring while an up and coming band is a hearty breed of animal unto it's own. Vehicles crammed to the ceiling with instruments, equipment and Humans. And in the vein of “no two snowflakes are the same"....the same unfortunately, pertains to the dreaded backside emission”.

Time to light up the olfactory senses. WARNING: sparking a joint under these conditions could be a “Houston, we have a problem” moment! A sardine can on wheels, complete with smells rivaling (ding, ding, ding), a sardine can.

Mmmmm yummy, an endless diet of high calorie fast food. One cannot fail to mention artery busters on offer at every mini mart. As members rattle down the highway, just know that sneaky, creepy, slow descending Hellions approach. The “belly blobs of grease du jour”. Bloody appetizing eh? Licking my lips now.

Hey, if your in the City of Angels, and weave your way past the smog, be sure to stop off at Tommies and load up on chili cheese burgers, dogs and fries. That is enhancing your travels 101. BEWARE: The oxygen starved brown cloud of oppression is always stalking and ready to pounce upon it's next victim!

Alternative/Indie - Media Boneheads

I want to come clean and admit to a problem. I suffer from an advanced form of “Auto Cringing”. It stems mostly from lower level, or downright dubious media types who do their absolute damnedest to pigeon-hole bands. I can see talking to a friend and saying something along the lines of “hey, have you heard that band Fitz and the Tantrums? Kind of a Philly, blues, soul, rock thing”. Throw in Motown, that's cool. The friend gets a quick read. Off they go, yea or nay, up to them.

Hey Media (loosely used), is it really necessary to blather on about a reincarnation of Darryl Hall? The new version of Darryl? Darryl 2010/2011? Darryl 2.0? The influence is heavy? Blah blah blah. Basic examples. And you can insert any artist you desire. Darryl is no doubt groovy, but this ain't Darryl kids. Get over it! I fully grasp influence thank you very much. I don't' need a golden “E” ticket for riding another tentacle of the monster marketing machine. Life=Influence=24/7.

So Media Monkey's, how about worrying about what's in front of you. Do that justice. Dig a little and use what's under your locks of hair to come up with questions not already asked a thousand bloody times. Please, show an effort that shows you care.

I observed a noticeable difference in band members personalities when they were interviewed by those who have confidence, through proper preparation and understand the subject of which they speak. If a few simple (should be automatic), things like that make for a more relaxed, fun, better quality interview, well?

Transparently thin Media Monkey's not really paying attention during an interview crack me up. It's as if their robotic alter ego takes over. Monotone voice: “My name is Chip, I have 10 questions to ask you. Since you know them by heart, please continue, I'll get a coffee”. Probably indulging in text messages and tweets.

I've managed to suck air, walk in the upright position Neanderthal style, and holy shit, even managed to learn how to count and eat with my digits. I am quite capable of regulating my life and making up my own mind as to whether I like or dislike what's in front of me at any given time.

Fitz, check it out: www.youtube.com/watch?v=1cVRkeFYXWA